


we'll cut our bodies free from the tethers of this scene

by Hollstein1698



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, Fluff and Angst, Hollstein - Freeform, Order 66, Star Wars AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-04
Updated: 2015-12-04
Packaged: 2018-05-04 20:01:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5346782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hollstein1698/pseuds/Hollstein1698
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jedi Knights Laura Hollis and Carmilla Karnstein have been fighting this war for too long.</p>
            </blockquote>





	we'll cut our bodies free from the tethers of this scene

**Author's Note:**

> Because I miss Hollstein, and because I'm way too excited for the new Star Wars movie.  
> Consider this my love letter to the Clone Wars, and also to Hollstein fluff.  
> Title from "Brand New Colony," by The Postal Service.

_Blasted scrapheaps_ , Laura thought as her lightsaber cut a deadly blue swath through the seemingly endless barrage of battle droids, slicing through them with ease, batting away blaster fire and redirecting them towards the droids. She had been at this for what felt like hours. The battalion of clone troops behind her were starting to thin dangerously, and Laura was getting desperate for backup. _Where in the world—_

"On your left, Hollis." 

Laura’s head jerked sideways and she was greeted to the sight of General Karnstein, landing out of a jump from out of nowhere, a flash of green igniting at her hand. Laura watched as Carmilla flung her lightsaber towards a hoard of Battle Droids with one hand, and sent a second hoard flying into a nearby cliff face with a sweep of the other. The two Jedi exchanged smirks. _Show off_ , Laura mouthed at Carmilla.

Republic battle ships flew down behind the line of droids— the rest of the General’s backup— and Laura breathed out a sigh of relief as Commander Lux and his battalion entered the fray. "I’m always saving your skin, Hollis," Carmilla commented flippantly before flashing her one more cocky grin and heading off into the rapidly retreating hoard of droids. Laura shook her head fondly and followed. 

Between the two Jedi and General Karnstein's reinforcements, the fight ended quickly. Carmilla’s clone commander Lux and his battalion captured the elusive General Morgan, and Laura and Carmilla oversaw her detainment, placing a heavily detailed guard around her tent at base camp that was located deep in the Sirparian jungle.

"About time we caught that one," Carmilla huffed as she and Laura exited the tent holding Morgan and her second in command, Captain Luce. "I feel like we've been chasing her since the war began."

"We _have_ been chasing her since the war began," Laura pointed out. 

"Right."

They passed Commader Lux on their way through base camp, and he greeted them both with a clipped, "General. Commander." Laura nodded at him politely and Carmilla clapped him on the shoulder. 

"Good work today, Lux.

"You flatter me, General."

"Sure, sure. Go on and celebrate a little, Commander."

Lux gave her a small nod and a ghost of a smile before Carmilla and Laura continued to walk. 

"He's not going to go off and celebrate at all is he?" Laura asked. 

"Not likely. He'll probably go on making sure the planet is secure."

"Aren't we supposed to be doing that?"

Carmilla eyed the campfires that were sprouting up and the soldiers who were starting what looked like quite the celebration. "We gave the clones their orders earlier. Chain of command, you know?" 

Laura rolled her eyes. "I've never met a lazier Jedi,” she teased.

Carmilla huffed unappreciatively. "I take great offense to that, seeing as how I'm always the one rolling in to save the day."

"You're developing a hero complex, Carm."

"Only for you, Laura."

At Carmilla's slow smile, Laura tried hard not to fidget or go red. That would be unbecoming for a Jedi. 

The two of them joined a unit of Laura's surviving ARC troopers for dinner. Laura was starving, and she shoveled whatever food she could get her hands on into her mouth. She partook in easy conversation with her troops, trading stories with them about the battle, mourning their heavy loses, and speculating at where they would be sent next. It was only after Captain Bolts made a comment about how lucky they were that General Karnstein showed up when she did that Laura noticed Carmilla's sudden absence. Looking around, Laura frowned through a bite of smoked nerf. She swallowed, excused herself, and went off in search of her friend. 

Laura passed several other campsites, recognizing both Carmilla's troops and her own, but she couldn't see Carmilla anywhere. Laura closed her eyes and reached out through the Force for a moment, finally sensing Carmilla somewhere on the outskirts of camp. Sighing and wondering what the other girl could be up to, Laura walked off towards the camp's exit. Two guards saluted her as she passed and she nodded at them. 

A few minutes’ walk away from camp, Laura found herself in front of a large lake. Carmilla was there at the water’s edge, her gaze turned upwards. Laura's face softened and she thought she should have known where Carmilla had gone off to. 

"Hey," Laura said quietly as she approached her friend. 

"Hey," Carmilla responded, turning her eyes on Laura. "I was wondering when you'd come find me."

Laura plopped down on the grass next to Carmilla and said, "Figured I should come and save you this time."

"Save me from what?"

"Whatever thoughts are floating around up there." Laura tapped her index finger lightly against Carmilla's temple. Carmilla let out a short huff of a laugh through her nose and returned her gaze skyward. Carmilla always did this after a battle. She once had told Laura that it was her own way of reminding herself there was always more to what she was feeling, more to the universe, more to the Force. Laura had never been as spiritual and philosophical as her friend, but she could appreciate the view. 

"Where do you think they'll send us next?" Laura asked, twirling a blade of grass between her fingers. 

"I'm not sure." 

Something in Carmilla's tone made Laura shoot her a puzzled look. "Is something wrong?" Laura could suddenly feel the nervous energy rolling off of Carmilla in waves, and she wondered how she missed it at first.

"It's just," Carmilla started, turning abruptly to face Laura, "I've just been getting this feeling lately. Today, after the fight, I got this... This flash. A vision." Carmilla stopped, pulling her lips together tightly. 

"Of what?" Laura pressed. She herself didn't receive visions very often. Her connection to the Force had always felt purely physical, making her a great warrior and very skilled with a lightsaber. Carmilla, however, had always had a strong spiritual connection with the Force, and for as long as Laura could remember, she had been plagued by visions of the future. (Though not always benign, this particular gift had gotten them out of a lot of trouble when they were younglings, allowing them to strategically sneak into the Temple kitchens to steal sweets from the cooks).

Carmilla took a deep breath and Laura could feel Carmilla’s emotions shift to an immense sadness. "It wasn't anything concrete then. Just a flash of... Of unimaginable pain. I came out here to maybe get a better sense of it."

"Did you?"

Carmilla nodded and said, hesitantly, "Laura, I don't think we win the war."

"How can that be possible?” Laura said, frowning. “During the last briefing, the Council said that Count Dooku had been defeated. There's no way we'll lose now that all we have to worry about is General Grievous,” Laura reasoned. “Maybe you misread it. Master Yoda always says that the future is in a state of constant motion."

"I've never had a vision this strong before, Laura," Carmilla said slowly, her eyes far away and Laura thought she must be replaying whatever it was she had seen in her head. "We lose. We lose and what's worse..." Carmilla trailed off, her brow creasing in uncertainty. "What's worse is that I can't see us anymore. The Jedi. I can't _see_ us."

Laura's breathed hitched. "What does that mean?"

Carmilla shook her head. “Look, Laura…” She trailed off again and this time when she met Laura's eyes, there was something else there besides fear. 

Laura found herself held by Carmilla's gaze, almost spellbound. She felt the same tug in her chest that she often felt when she was around Carmilla, a pang that shot right through her and blazed outwards when Carmilla leaned forward to press their foreheads together. Laura felt so warm, the blaze spreading from her chest up to color her cheeks. "Carm, what...?"

"Laura, you _know_. You've always known," Carmilla whispered, her lips a hairsbreadth away from Laura's.  

Laura wanted to deny it. Every fiber of her being was screaming at her to pull away. Every lesson about love and attachments leading to darkness filtered through her brain at a rapid rate. 

But she _did_ know, had known since she was fifteen and had looked out of the viewport of a starship with Carmilla at her side and had thought that no matter how beautiful the rushing stars outside were, Carmilla was still more beautiful yet. Had known in the many months and sometimes years of separation while they were Padawans and she missed Carmilla in a way that felt so different from the way she missed her other friends from the Temple. Had known when they reunited as Knights for the first time and spent the night celebrating together on Coruscant, letting Carmilla drag her to a cantina against her better judgment. Had known, perhaps irrefutably, during the last two and a half years of war, when the relief at seeing Carmilla alive had overwhelmed Laura to the point of tears on several occasions. 

"I do know," Laura breathed. 

Carmilla closed her eyes and wound an arm around Laura's waist to pull her flush against her. Laura's body responded immediately, and she brought her hands up to cradle Carmilla's face. "More than once I have thought that the Force brought me to the Jedi for the sole purpose of meeting you," Carmilla whispered against Laura’s lips, and Laura felt even warmer at her words. Laura’s breathing was coming in irregularly, and she didn't know what exactly to say to that. Instead, she leaned in and brushed her lips softly against Carmilla's. It was a slow kiss, the touch feather light and shy. She knew this went against many Jedi rules, but she also knew it was a feeling she had been fighting against for many, many years, and it felt like a dam was bursting in her chest now. She wanted to press forward and kiss Carmilla with more purpose, but Carmilla moved away before she could. She gripped Laura’s waist tighter, however, her eyes flickering over every inch of Laura’s face. Laura knew that look meant Carmilla was thinking something over very carefully.

“Go on, spit it out,” Laura said through a small smile.

“I’m afraid you won’t like it.” Carmilla wove a hand through Laura’s hair, still seemingly searching her face for the courage to say whatever it was she was thinking. Laura felt goose bumps spring up on the back of her neck at Carmilla’s touch.

“When has that ever stopped you before?”

A smirk tugged at the corner of Carmilla’s mouth. “True.”

“So?”

With a small sigh, Carmilla pressed another kiss to Laura’s forehead before pulling back. “Laura,” Carmilla started, “We need to leave.”

“Leave?”

“The order. The Jedi. This planet. Right now.” Carmilla paused to take a deep breath, as though she couldn’t believe what she was saying herself. “We need to get on a ship and never look back. Take whatever credits we have and go somewhere remote. Somewhere no one can track us down. Somewhere we can be together, away from the rules of the Jedi, away from the war. Away from whatever fate is destined to befall the Order. Because Laura,” Carmilla paused again, the fear returning full force to her eyes, “Something terrible _is_ going to happen to the Republic. I can’t see it completely, it’s like this… shadow is hiding the exact details but… I know two things with utter certainty. If we stay here, we will die. And if we go, I can spend the rest of my life loving you the way I’ve always wanted to.”

Laura felt her mouth unhinge slightly in utter amazement. She didn’t know what to think, or what to say. How did she end up here? Not two hours ago she had been fighting for democracy, fighting for the Order and the Republic, fighting to save a world from the oppression of the Separatists. And now, her closest friend, the woman she had been secretly in love with for years, was telling her it was all for nothing? “Carmilla, you can’t be serious—”

“I’ve never been more serious about anything in my whole life.” The fierce determination in her eyes and the set of her jaw told Laura enough how true that was. 

“Carm, but… Can’t we do something? Tell someone? We can’t just leave, we have to help.”

“It’s too late, Laura.” To Laura’s complete surprise, she saw tears in Carmilla’s eyes. Carmilla was never one for tears. “Whatever it is, it’s too late to stop it. It’s beyond us. We’re inconsequential, and whatever is going to happen will happen no matter what we do. But we _can_ leave.” Carmilla gripped Laura’s arm, and a couple tears fell down her face. “Please, Laura. I love you. I want to live so I can continue to love you.”

Laura felt tears of her own start to well up at Carmilla’s desperation. “Carm, I love you too. But this is just so hard for me to get my head around. The Jedi are our family—”

“And they’re doomed,” Carmilla interrupted. “I don’t want to be doomed with them. Laura, do you trust me?”

“Yes,” Laura answered immediately. “You know I do.”

“Then believe that what I’m saying is real. Please, leave with me.”

Laura shook her head several times, trying to clear her thoughts and center her emotions, like she had always been taught to do. But right now, she felt too off center to even try and think rationally, the way a Jedi was supposed to. All she could think was that even if the Jedi weren’t doomed, she’d want to leave with Carmilla anyway, just so she could be with her. “I don’t know if what you’re saying will come to pass or not, you know I’ve never been able to see the future,” Laura said slowly, and she saw Carmilla visibly deflate. “No, no, Carm, don’t.” Laura reached for Carmilla again, wiping her tears away with the pads of her thumbs. “But even though I can’t see what you’re seeing, I want to go with you."

Carmilla pulled Laura to her again and kissed her deeply, making Laura’s head spin. She had never felt so many things at once in her whole life. Fear, love, sadness, excitement. It was making Laura lightheaded.

When Carmilla pulled away again, she stood up, tugging Laura along with her. “We need to go. Get your things and meet me here when you’re done.”

“Okay.” Laura gave Carmilla one more kiss before they separated off towards their respective tents.

Laura wanted to run, she was so desperate to leave. She wanted to go quickly, before she gave herself enough time to talk herself out of it. She forced herself to remember Carmilla’s fear, the desperation in her voice, the fact that she was so sure that their presence on this planet meant certain death. She passed a group of her troops on her way to her tent, all of them rather intoxicated.

Once Laura reached her tent, she went to the corner to grab her pack. There wasn’t much, but then again, most Jedi did not own many possessions. It carried a med pack, a canteen of water, a decent amount of credits, a change of clothes, and a blanket. She hoped she wouldn’t be questioned as to why she was leaving camp with everything she owned. As she was reaching for the tent’s opening, something made Laura stop and reach for her lightsaber. She unhooked it from her belt and frowned down at it. She wasn’t sure what made her do it, but she stashed it in her pack as well, then left her tent.

Trying to look as nonchalant as possible, Laura made her way through base again. Many of the clones were singing, loudly and drunkenly, and Laura hoped that whatever happened, at least perhaps her troops would be safe.

When Laura reached the guards posted at the exit, she hesitated for a moment, before deciding that acting any differently would be more of an indicator of something being amiss. Indeed, they only saluted her again as she gave them a polite nod. Once she was out of their line of sight, Laura breathed a sigh of relief, then took off at a sprint towards the lake. She reached out, trying to sense if Carmilla was there already, but she couldn’t feel anything. Her heart skipped a beat, apprehension starting to settle heavy in her chest.

Laura reached the lake’s edge, and sucked in two quick breaths, trying to slow her rapid heartbeat that had more to do with her nerves, and less to do with the easy sprint. She shuffled her weight from one foot to the other restlessly, staring ahead at the direction she knew Carmilla would arrive from. “Come on, Carm,” she muttered under her breath, “Now’s not the time for your usual lateness.”

Laura waited anxiously for another five minutes, fighting an internal battle with herself on whether or not she should go in after Carmilla. The thought that maybe Carmilla had been playing a gigantic prank on her also entered her mind once or twice.

Suddenly, the sound of blaster fire reached Laura’s ears. Laura’s heart stopped, and she couldn’t believe it, but the sounds were coming _back from camp_.

_Laura!_

Laura’s feet were suddenly carrying her forward, Carmilla’s voice echoing strongly through the Force. She was running on autopilot, urging herself to move faster with the aid of the Force. She stopped a meter or so away from the camp’s exit when she saw the telltale green flash of Carmilla’s lightsaber. “Carm!”

Before Laura could move to grab her own weapon, Carmilla was at her side. Laura registered that the blaster fire had ceased, but she could feel a wave of murderous intent rippling through the base camp. But that couldn’t be right, that camp was solely inhabited by—

“The _clones_ ,” Carmilla panted. “Laura, our troops. Lux tried to _kill_ me.”

“Let’s go,” Laura said, tugging at Carmilla’s sleeve and pushing aside her confusion and hurt for the time being. “We need to run.”

+++

It was to their credit that they hadn’t expedited the process of securing the planet. If they had, they would have found getting offworld to be a lot harder than it was. Laura and Carmilla managed to slip on a public registered transport under fake names, both of them having ditched their Jedi garb for plain brown and black tunics and leggings, making sure to stash their lightsabers in their packs and out of sight. They knew they wouldn’t be able to travel this way for long.

The whispered rumors on board the ship were that the Jedi had betrayed the Republic by attempting to take control of the Senate by trying to assassinate the Chancellor. And if the rumors were to be believed, once they landed, there was a strong possibly that there would be a checkpoint maned by clone troops, searching for any escaping Jedi.

Sitting in the common lounge, listening to what was at least the government sponsored version of the truth, Laura felt sick. She felt sick at the betrayal that had come, not from the Jedi, but from her government. It was clear to her who must have given the clone troops the command to turn on their Jedi leaders.

Laura grabbed at the hand of the girl sitting next to her, needing Carmilla’s comforting touch.

“It’ll be okay, Laura,” Carmilla murmured, stroking her thumb along Laura’s knuckles. “Once we get out of the Arkanis Sector and into some deeper space, we’ll be okay.”

Laura let out a slow breath, nudging herself into the crook of Carmilla’s neck. “I’m sorry I didn’t believe you quicker, Carm.”

“It’s okay.” Carmilla sighed, massaging Laura’s scalp slowly with her free hand. “We survived, that’s all that matters.”

+++

It was on their second day aboard the ship that Carmilla checked the coded Jedi frequency on her comlink in the privacy of their room, only to hear Master Obi-Wan Kenobi’s voice warning any surviving Jedi to stay away from the Temple, but to keep hope and their faith in the Force. Laura and Carmilla shared saddened glances, but somehow, knowing that at least one more of their number was out there brought them both a sense of peace.

+++

Their ship dropped them off at Arkanis, the capitol of the sector, and probably the worst planet that the two runaways could have probably landed on. Laura and Carmilla both quelled their apprehension at the sight of the clone maned checkpoint that awaited them at the base of the landing ramp, using the Force to shroud themselves, blending in amongst the rest of the travelers. They were so successful, the clones almost passed them over entirely. However, at the clones’ insistence for the presentation of identification, Laura and Carmilla used the Force to influence the officers into believing their identifications to be that of their fake names. “That’ll be all,” the clone intoned, “Move along.”

Laura and Carmilla visibly relaxed, though they balked at the sheer amount of troops they saw around the dock.

“Getting a ship might be harder than we thought,” Laura said weakly.

“Come on, Laura. When did we ever back down from a challenge?”

Laura smiled at Carmilla’s attempt at being bracing, and kissed her lightly. “You’re right. Well, let’s get out of here then.”

+++

It took a lot of subtle asking around, but they finally found a vendor willing to part with a decade old ILH-KK  _Citadel_ -class civilian cruiser for only ten thousand credits.

“It’ll at least get us offworld,” Carmilla reasoned with a pouty Laura, who was hoping for something a little more… well, more.

“Let’s just hope it doesn’t break down on us. We might need to be in this thing for a while before we can figure out a planet to settle down on.”

Carmilla gave Laura a curiously blank stare.

“What?” Laura asked, self-consciously.

Carmilla yanked Laura forward by her belt loops and kissed her soundly.

Dazed, Laura blinked up at Carmilla for a moment after pulling away. “What was that for?”

“We’re going to get through this,” Carmilla said, rubbing her hands up and down Laura’s arms slowly.

“We will.” Laura leaned up and kissed her again.

+++

It was in the quiet of space that Laura finally let herself feel the loss of her family. They had heard more news during their brief stay on Arkanis, and from what they heard, the Jedi had been all but extinguished, and the Republic that Laura had spent her life fighting for had been turned into a new Galactic Empire.

Laura sat, curled in on herself, in the copilot’s seat of the ship, lost in her own head. She didn’t know if there were any other survivors besides Master Kenobi, but she hoped that if there were, that they could find their way to safety. She mourned too, the loss of her life’s work. She was certain that whatever happened, tyranny would soon follow the formation of this new Empire.

“Laura?”

Carmilla’s voice yanked Laura out of her reverie, and it was then that Laura realized she had been crying. She wiped away at her tears furiously. “Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize.” Carmilla stood up from her seat to stand in front of Laura. Camilla cradled her face and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “It’s hard for me too. Everything we knew. Everything we fought for.” Carmilla sighed, and Laura felt the breath against her skin. “Starting over is hard.”

“If it hadn’t been for you, we wouldn’t even have this chance to start over.”

“We were lucky.”

Laura stood up, gripping Carmilla’s forearms lightly. “We _are_ lucky. I’m glad we get to start over together, Carm.”

Carmilla hummed her assent and tipped Laura’s chin up, letting her other hand drift down to Laura’s waist, pulling her closer and kissing her softly.

Laura pulled away with her hands on Carmilla’s chest. “Okay, pilot, don’t you have a ship that needs to be put into hyperspace?”

Carmilla grinned and kissed Laura once more before returning to her seat. She rested her hand on the hyperspace lever, and looked up at Laura again. “Ready?”

And Laura was.

 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! You can find me over [on Tumblr.](http://hollstein1698.tumblr.com/)


End file.
